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So, it’s finally here. After an absolutely banana sandwich of an NCAA Tourney that included perhaps the greatest upset in tournament history w/Michigan State falling in the opening round to 15th seeded Middle Tennesee led by the starting shooting guard on the First Team All-Name Team Giddy Potts.

We saw a team in Syracuse who was basically poopy pants all season and finished TENTH in the ACC get the luck of the draw and not only sneak into the field but, didn’t play a seed lower than 7 until the Elite Eight. That being said, they beat who was in front of them and if they can play like they did in that ridiculous comeback against UVA then perhaps they can give UNC a run for their dicks.

As a former Saint Joseph’s basketball player, my hatred for Villanova is pretty strong. However, I do like Jay Wright and I think this team is (clearly) much different than those higher seeded teams we’ve seen get bounced early in the past. The Wildcats have a matchup with the best player in the country, Buddy Hield, and Oklahoma in what should be a fantastic game. Hield is straight up unguardable as we’ve seen him go for 30+ in his last two games. It’ll be interesting to see what Nova can throw at him to try and contain him a bit but, one might suggest focusing in on Cousins and Woodard and kind of letting Buddy get his. We shall see. Nova is led by 11th year senior Ryan Arcgiahgandoanano who is still putting up good numbers despite being 41 years old.

Pick- Buddy Hield’s dick is too big: Oklahoma by 6

In the other matchup we have a North Carolina team that is playing the best basketball in the country at, obviously, the right time to be doing so. 14 time pre-season ACC player of the year Marcus Paige has finally come out from under his rock and is playing like we’ve all been waiting for him to play for the last 9 years he’s been at UNC.

Analysis: Syracuse sucks. UNC is really good.

Pick: UNC by 12

 

So, things could currently be going better for our boy Kyrie Irving. The ruthlessness of Twitter knows no bounds, especially when it comes to celebrity gossip. Apparently, Kyrie has been dating some R&B singer Kehlani for awhile now. Back on Valentine’s Day she posted this on Instagram:

The picture on the left was posted on Valentine’s Day expressing her love for Kyrie. Fast forward to today and this dude PARTYNEXTDOOR who is one of Drake’s OvO boys posted the other picture of her in bed with him. Savage move by that guy. There’s just no coming back from a guy named PARTYNEXTDOOR putting his penis in your girlfriend. As someone who tends to speak only in capital letters, I can confirm that this dude is most likely awesome at sex. Research proves that. Thoughts and prayers for Kyrie.