It was pretty much a known fact that David Stern had much of the NBA rigged during his tenure as commish. I sort have figured that this new guy Adam Silver, who reminds me too much of an insect for my own personal liking, would have done something to sweet to rid the people of those memories and show that the NBA will be legit now. Fucked that one up pretty bad last night I’d say. The Cavs end up with another #1 pick, their second straight and third in four years, when they only had a 1.7% chance to end up with it this year. Not to mention, they also had two #4 overall picks in that same span. So Lebron decides to leave, and since then we’re just going to give the Cavs all the #1 picks they want? Seems fair. OH WAIT NO IT DOESN’T. Like what in the hell. I mean, it’s not like it really matters, since the Cavs haven’t even managed to turn their ridiculously good draft fortunes into any type of team that can actually compete, but hey, maybe Lebron will end up back in Cleveland playing with a bunch of other #1 overall picks. That’d be something huh. Anyways, my Nuggets walked away with the #11 pick, and the way things are shaping up it looks like we’ll end up getting a pretty solid player there. I’m thinking either Gary Harris, Zach LaVine, or my boy Doug McDermott, and lets not forget about PJ Hariston, who since being kicked out of college averaged a cool 22 a game in the D-League. I would be fine with any of those guys to be honest. Love the future look of my Nuggets, we didn’t play a single game with our actual starting 5 this year and we are only going to get better at the only position we are truly lacking at when healthy, shooting guard. Ty Lawson is a great point guard, Faried and McGee are monsters on the glass and defending at the rim, Gallinari will be back to his efficient self after more than a full year of rest with the ACL injury, and then any of the aforementioned guys at the 2? Let’s fucking GO!
But aside from all of this basketball talk, let me get to the real winner of the NBA Draft Lottery, and basically the only reason I started writing this article, Mallory Edens. 18-year-old daughter of the Bucks co-owner Wes Edens, represented the Bucks last night and looked absolutely stunning.
She didn’t bring her Bucks home the #1 pick, even with the best odds of doing so, that’s all irrelevant. She’s my new #1 pick. If I were the Cavs, I would work on figuring out some type of trade to get Anthony Bennett’s whack ass out of Cleveland in exchange for Mallory. At 24, am I a too old to be talking about 18-year-old smokes? Maybe. But like I said yesterday, I just call it how I see it. Plus chicks mature like 2 years faster than dudes so basically I’m 22 and she’s 20. Match made in heaven. Hit me up sometime Mallory.