Alright so I wasn’t able to get to you fuckers about the first round of the playoffs, which sucks because it was hands down the best first round in the NBA since I’ve been watching basketball, and probably arguably ever. Can’t speak on the the years before my time because I wasn’t there in person, but I don’t see how this year’s first round could have ever been topped. Now, you all probably won’t believe me but its worth noting that everyone who I thought was going to win their first round series did prevail except for the Bulls. Going into the series, I thought they would pull it off because they play harder than any team in the NBA on any given night. But after the first game o the series when I saw a young, inexperienced Wizards team not only outplay the Bulls, but out-hustling the Bulls, I knew the Wizards would win. The only edge the Bulls had in that series was their hustle. When they lost that edge, they lost the series. I’ll admit that I didn’t think the Mavs would take the Spurs to Game 7, but they have so many strange players that are just mismatches for almost every team that it didn’t really surprise me that much. The Heat were obviously gonna mop the Bobcats. Grizzlies made it interesting, but there was no way Durant was going to allow his team exit in the first round, especially at the hands of the team that ousted him last year. That rivalry is now, in my opinion, one of the two best in basketball, with the other being Clippers/Warriors. Yes I had the Nets over the Raptors, Raptors are just too young and the Nets have more playoff experience on their team then probably any other team in the NBA. Love the Warriors, but there was no way the Clippers were losing that series, especially after all the Donald Sterling bullshit. Despite how poorly the Pacers played after the All Star break, they weren’t going to lose to the fucking Hawks. Can’t believe it took them as long as it did to get their heads out of their own asses, definitely didn’t think it would go 7, but don’t kid yourself, that Game 7 win for the Pacers has awoken the beast. If that first round wasn’t an eye opener for that team, then I don’t know what will. Either someone is fucking someone else’s bitch on that team,the MonStars stole all their talent and are running shit against the Michael Jordan-less TuneSqaud, or possibly the acquisition of Andrew Bynum, aka the biggest piece of shit in the entire league, resulted in some super bad juju for them. Those are literally the only 3 possible explanations for how badly they have been playing lately, we’ll see how they respond in round 2. And amongst the plethora of very good teams in the West, somehow people forgot about how good the Trail Blazers are. They were mediocre at best in January and February, but championships aren’t won in the winter. Anyone who watched them play at the beginning of the year saw how good they could be, and anyone watching their series with the Rockets realized that they have two bonafied stars in Lillard and Aldridge. Now for the second round.


Spurs vs. Trail Blazers

Can’t emphasize enough how much I love the Trail Blazers team. Just a bunch of guys who are not only great all around basketball players, but there isn’t a single attention-seeking, primadonna guy there. Which is rare these days. Ironically enough, the only other team that could boast such a claim would be the team that they are playing. The Trail Blazers are a team on the rise that is going up against the older, deeper, more experienced version of themselves. Gotta go with the vets and the best coach in all of sports here, no disrespect to Portland. Spurs in 6.

Clippers vs. Thunder

Probably the toughest call for me out of the all the second round match ups. Can’t make heads or tails out of the emotional roller-coaster the Clippers have been through over the last week or so. They could ride it to the finals or it could just be too much to handle and draining them, leading to their exit from the playoffs. Or it could mean absolutely nothing since it has nothing to do with the actual sport of basketball. In the end, I gotta go with my boy Durant. He will almost certainly be named MVP in the next couple days, and rightfully so. I think that, coupled with their valiant comeback effort against the Grizzlies, will be more than enough to push them through to the Western Conference Finals. Thunder in 6.

Pacers vs. Wizards

Got nothing but respect for the Wizards after watching their series against the Bulls. Didn’t watch them that much during the year, but they impressed me for such a young team. John Wall is probably a year or two away from being an absolute superstar. But they are outmatched at every other position, including their bench and their coach. Unless the Pacers revert back to whatever the fuck they want to consider that poor excuse for basketball was, this series will be over shortly. I’ll give the Wizards one on their home court, but I just don’t see them winning any more then that. Pacers in 5.

Heat vs. Nets

If you’ve ever read anything I’ve written about basketball then you know how much I fucking despise the Heat. Loathe them. And basically every single person who plays for them. Not gonna sit here and pretend that Lebron isn’t the best two way player on the planet, because he absolutely is. But you know what? I don’t give a shit. The Nets play with this chip on their shoulder that always seems to come out in its fullest when they play the Heat. I know the regular season doesn’t mean shit, but it’s worth noting that the Nets on all four games they played the Heat in this year. And with guys like Garnett and Pierce, who have plenty of history with King James and company, and their incredibly deep bench, I actually like the Nets chances. I watched all four regular season games between these two teams, and the thing that I noticed was that if these two met in the playoffs, that Shaun Livingston will determine the outcome of this series. Not at all the guy you would think of being the X-factor in this, but he 100%  is. The Nets flat out match up very well with the Heat, and have no problem playing the small lineup when Lebron moves to his “point forward” position that usually causes a fit for almost every other team in the league. I’ll admit that I’m making this pick with my heart and not my head, because my brain is telling me “hey idiot, the heat are probably going to win this in 6” but if you don’t follow your heart then what are you really doing with your life. You know? So fuck it. I’m going with my boys in black. Nets in 7.


See y’all when we get to the Conference Finals. Hope this round is as good as the first round, although that’s almost asking for the impossible.


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