The Latest And Greatest Story Proving That America Has Officially Lost All Of It’s Marbles

Posted: December 10, 2013 by woody in Actual News
Tags: , , , , , , ,

Yahoo! News:

Transportation Security Administration workers can face real danger, as was demonstrated during the deadly shooting at Los Angeles International Airport last month.

Still, confiscating a sock monkey’s sidearm? Washington state resident Phyllis May told Seattle’s that she was chastised by a TSA agent over the fact that her stuffed sock monkey (name: Rooster Monkburn, a takeoff on Rooster Cogburn of “True Grit” fame) carried a toy pistol.

May told that she and her husband were going through security at St. Louis International Airport when a TSA agent held up one of her bags and asked who it belonged to.

Every fucking day with this shit man. At this point nothing surprises me anymore. I get that airport safety is a huge thing, especially nowadays with all the psychos we have running around, but there’s got to be a point where common sense comes in to play. It’s a fucking sock monkey. I mean, in the TSA agent’s defense, “Rooster Monkburn” is a pretty badass looking dude. Suspicious as fuck with that eye patch.



So the TSA agent pulled Phyllis May aside and told her, “this is a gun” to which she very reasonably responded, “no, its not a gun, its a prop for my monkey”. Pretty much what anyone else in the world would think. The agent then said, “if I held it up to your neck, you wouldn’t know if it was real or not”. Flabbergasted, May asked if she was kidding, and the agent assured her that she wasn’t, and that she would be confiscating the gun and notifying the police. For the record, this is the gun in question.



Yea. That thing is what supposedly could be confused for a real gun. In the end, May never got in any trouble, and the police reportedly weren’t contacted like the agent claimed they would be. But she never received the gun for her sock monkey back, which is total bullshit. Who’s coming with me to Canada.


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