UK Scientists Develop “Terminator” Hand

Posted: April 26, 2013 by woody in Actual News
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Fucking technology. Never ceases to amaze me. The possibilities are truly becoming endless. This kid Patrick Kane contracted Meningitis when he was only 9 months old. Doctors were forced to amputate Patrick’s right leg below the knee as well as all of the fingers of his left hand and part of each finger on his right hand. He didn’t get his first prosthetic hand until he was 9 years old, which he admittedly “didn’t really use that much”. But now, at age 16, he has one hell of an upgrade. He is one of the first people in the world to test out the “i-limb Ultra Revolution”, developed by Touch Bionics in Livingston. Feature include a motorized rotating thumb which reacts to the muscles signals from the wearer, aka it will move exactly how you would move your normal hand based on what the muscles in your arm is telling it to do. It can also move automatically into 24 pre-set positions, which are stored and can be controlled from your fucking iPhone. Unbelievable. When Kane was asked about how he liked his new hand, he said, “It’s more efficient and everything looks and feels so much smoother. You can make the thumb oppose your fingers or make it parallel with them. Previously I’d have to manually change my thumb by pushing it with my other hand. It’s slowly getting closer to being like a real human hand. It can even do things a real hand can’t, and sometimes stronger and quicker. It’s really useful in science class when everyone has to use metal tongs to pick up things that are really hot while I can just use my hand. I get a lot of Terminator jokes. A real human hand will be difficult to replicate exactly as it has had millions of years of evolution put into it. But the possibilities this new hand offers are very exciting”. Here’s a look at the hand.

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Great. So now we have fucking terminators running around the UK. We’re fucked for the next Olympics, that’s all I’m saying. Shout out to that kid who lives on the bottom of my road who has a mustache and plays in that band for the tip.

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