Zlatan Ibrahimovic Shows Once Again Why He Is My Favorite Soccer Player

Posted: March 2, 2013 by woody in Sports
Tags: , , , , ,

As if scoring probably the best goal ever didn’t already solidify him as my favorite player…


Now he’s gone out and done this. I guess this a couple week’s old but I never heard about it until last night. Most people have heard about how David Beckham is donating his entire salary that his new team PSG is paying him to a Parisian children’s charity. A nice gesture to say the least, but I’m pretty sure Beckham has plenty of money to be rather comfortable for the rest of his life. Well Ibrahimovic wasn’t too impressed by Beckham’s decision.

He had this to say on the matter, “I heard Beckham’s decision and it made me think…Who is most deserving of all of the money that I, Zlatan, am paid? The answer is Zlatan. The children of Paris are not leading Ligue 1 in goals this season. I am. I have 20 goals. The next best players have 12. Twelve! If anything, the children of Paris should be giving me even more money for having the privilege of being in the same city as my incredible quality. And so should David Beckham. Call it a Zlaritable donation”. PAH!!

He went on to say, “When I signed with PSG the politicians called my wages ‘indecent’ in a time when so many people are struggling, even though it is a lot of money that can be taxed and help the country…Now Beckham gives all of his wages to a local charity and people call him a tax dodger. Both are examples of stupid people complaining about good things. It is a waste of breath. Like Pep Guardiola blowing up his own birthday balloons, which I then pop with an overhead kick the second he is finished. These people should be subject to a 75 percent stupidity tax payable to the Bank of Zlatan. Then they will have something to really complain about”.

Unreal. Not giving a fuck like you read about. You think Ibrahimovic cares about all the children out there who are much worse off then himself? Nope. He doesn’t give a flying fuck. In fact, he thinks they should give him money, because it is “a privilege” to be in the same city as someone as incredible as himself. Beckham should pay him all the money he makes too. Absolutely incredible. I don’t know how I go about starting a Bank of Woody, but I need to get on that ASAP.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s