Top 5 Shows On Network TV

Posted: January 16, 2013 by woody in Fun, TV
Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

Ok so here’s the deal. I was originally going to write about the 5 best shows on TV. But then I realized that’s not exactly fair, because not only can you have way sicker shows on HBO and Showtime and what have you because you can show boobs and other cool things, bu then you also have cartoon’s which require a lot less acting and you can basically do anything with. So I had to break it into three different categories, Dumb Network TV (no boobs), Awesome HBO, Showtime, Etc. (tons of boobs), and Cartoons (sometimes cartoon boobs). The other two lists will come later in the week, but for now, on to the list at hand. It’s always hard to decide what’s better when weighing a comedy against a drama, so this took a lot of back and forth, but finally I have come up with a final product. Here are the best 5 shows on network TV today, despite what TV guide or the ratings or  whatever fucking “expert’s” list might have to say.

5) Parks and Recreation


Just a great all around comedy here. All star cast. The three people you probably recognize are Amy Poehler from Saturday Night Live ,Aziz Ansari from various stand up comedies and a few movies, and Rashida Jones from The Office. Although Aziz is up there for my favorite character, in the end it has to go to a man who most of you probably don’t recognize, Nick Offerman (aka “Ron Swanson”). This dude just absolutely gets it. Every man should want to be Ron Swanson. Also, Aubrey Plaza, who you might recognize from the movie “Funny People” is probably the sneaky funniest person on the show.

4) Workaholics

Adam Devine; Anders Holm; Blake Anderson (from left)

Probably the funniest show on this list. If you know the meaning of friendship than you will love this show. Just three buddies fresh out of college who came to the realization that they’re going to have to work in the boring ass real world, but still find a way to absolutely live the dream. These guys got famous from an assortment of youtube videos that someone important must have found funny so he gave them a half hour slot on comedy central. And they have been killing it ever since. Blake is hands down my favorite character of the three, but they are all a fucking riot.

3) American Horror Story


I’m usually not a fan of horror films because they all usually suck and aren’t scary, and I’ve never really seen another “horror show”, so this was all a little new to me at first. The most recent of any of the shows on this list to come out, AHS is only into it’s second season, but from the first episode you know your going to be hooked. The character development is unreal in the first season, as you gradually learn more and more about the haunted house the family lives in, and all the ghosts that inhabit it. It also manages to mix in a bit of humor and a ton of sexual content (always good for the soul), as is seen in the first episode when one of the ghosts is straight finger blasting herself in a suggestive maid costume. I was blown away that they were allowed to even show that on TV. Although the first season ended with a bang and set up a second season that would have been awesome, they decided to do something different than other shows and come up with an entirely new plot, but with most of the same actors and actresses. It would have absolutely nothing to do with the first season, and could probably even be considered as its own separate show. I have to admit I was skeptical at first about that, as I was highly anticipating where they were going to go with the story that ends in season 1. I didn’t think it was going to be as good, but when I finally watched the first episode of the second season, I got completely hooked again. It’s every bit as good as the first season, possibly even better because of the new alien factor they bring in to it, and we all know I have a boner for aliens. Its an absolute must watch.

2) Modern Family


Not only is this show a great comedy, but it’s also just a feel good show. Makes you feel a little better about your wacko family when compared to the show, with tons of heart felt moments along the way. But aside from all the mooshy fag bullshit, this show is just flat out hilarious. The best characters in my opinion are Luke, the youngest of the three in the middle, Phil, the dad in the middle, and Cam, the one who wears absurd shirts with the brightest cuffs I have ever seen in my life on the right. Just awesome family dynamic the entire time and will keep you laughing the whole show. And if you don’t wanna take my word for it just ask the 16 Emmy’s they’ve won in 4 years.

1) Breaking Bad


Breaking Bad is hands down the best show on network TV, and if you think otherwise than I strongly advise you to do us all a favor and kill yourself. I just got into it at the end of this past summer and I knocked out the entire 5 seasons up to date in less than a month, and that was with a full time job. I basically just substituted Breaking Bad for sleep. Not something I would recommend for anyone, as I’m more or less a medical anomaly and have had years of practice with no sleep, but if you don’t watch this show already you need to start. Its utterly mind boggling that  Bryan Cranston can go from the loveable father in Malcolm In The Middle, to playing one of the most badass characters TV has ever known in Breaking Bad. Do yourself a favor and get hooked immediately.


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